Models have superpowers too, just don't hold your breath about what those powers are!

There are people in this world that have been bestowed with a great 'gift', a special power that differentiates them from the rest of humanity. Their use of this power either elevates them to the status of Superhero or Supervillain, depending on the choices they make at key moments of their lives: rob a bank, save a cat from a tree, raid the Lindt factory, help a little old lady with her grocery bags, steal Donald Trump's entire toupee collection...

Then there are those who choose not to use their powers for good or evil, those that are afraid of what lies beneath their own potential & the choices they may have to make. They're commonly known as 'wussies' & are generally the scorn of both Supervillains and Superheroes alike - one of the few things both parties actually share.

Further still are those who possess powers that are of a very 'special' set. A set of powers so amazingly special, not because they are unique & extremely rare, but because of the potency of their 'power' & the level to which they have grown in their power.

The Supervillian's Guide to Art, Part 1: Kicking up a SuperFuss!

So Brett Murray's painting 'The Spear' has caused such a furore in the last few days that I can no longer remain silent on the issue - since no self-respecting supervillain is without an opinion on everything.

The painting (on display at the Goodman Gallery) initially caused a storm of media frenzy & debate within the country due to it's depiction of President Jacob Zuma in all his 'glory' -  not only does the painting portray Zuma in a fashion similar to an iconic poster of Lenin, but Jay-Z's ahem, 'manhood' is exposed for all to see.

So naturally loads of people kicked up a fuss about the painting, including the ANC & President Zuma himself - who claims that the painting depicts him as "a philanderer and a womaniser" & makes a mockery of his office.
At this point in time it is worth pointing out that Jay-Z has been married 6 times, currently has 4 wives & a fiancée, and also has had a couple of kids out of wedlock with a bunch of other women. Then there's also the issue of all the comments he made during his infamous rape trial...
So naturally, 'The Spear' is a rather appropriate title for the painting, which is part of Murray's 'Hail to the Thief II' exhibition at the gallery.
The ANC threatened to take legal action against the Goodman Gallery in the Johannesburg High Court, after their request to have the exhibition censored, was denied by the gallery.

Like, shoo-wow Jacob bru! -puff puff-

Rule #41 of The Supervillain's Guide to Super Villainy:

• Ensure that your statements, threats & declarations of evil intent on your way to World Domination, are clear!

There are plenty of stupid people out there. And while that means an endless availability of possible minions, it also means that you are going to have to explain yourself often. Very clearly. Id est; you're going to have to spell it out for most people!
For instance, should you go public with your Super Evil Plan to induce an ice age across the planet, there are going to be those that interpret your threat as a kindhearted gesture in affording them the opportunity to build snowmen, go ice-skating, sing Christmas carols all year round!
And so while you're thinking annihilation of idiots, they're thinking winter wonderland...
As a SuperVillain, it's important to be specific, clear to the point that your words cannot be interpreted in any other way than the one you initially intended.
Let's take a lesson from one of my favourite politicians; Jacob Zuma.
During a speech at Thursday's funeral for "freedom fighter" Billy Nair, Zuma is quoted as saying that he "used to smoke zol" together with Nair.
For those international readers, "zol" is a colloquial term for cannibis and is mostly used by the smokers of the substance.
Naturally you can imagine the uproar over the statement, much like the furor over Bill Clinton's 1992 response of "I did not inhale". And of course, the ANC very quickly released a statement saying that Zuma had been referring to hand-rolled cigarettes and not cannibis. Uhuh...
Nice one Zuma!
Frankly I could care less about whether he smoked cannibis many years ago. He's still an absolute idiot for making a sentimental statment with such ambiguous and incriminating information. And even if he didn't smoke cannibis, there's always going to be that speculation in the minds of the public in future.