Supervillain Basics: Track Records

There are a few things you just can't be a successful supervillain without; supervillainous powers, evil plans, timeousness, reliability & a trusty utility belt.
Success does not come from arriving late to take over the world or destroy your nemesis' entire collection of neon spandex jumpsuits. No Siree!
No one likes an unreliable supervillain (or superhero for that matter), because you just end up looking like an idiot & pissing people off.

So if you say: "Meet me at 8pm on the top of Trump Tower so that I can kick your toupee'd arse & wipe that cocky smile off your botoxed face", you better be there to deliver kid. Or you'll just go down in history as the no-show douchebag with the big mouth & short supervillain resume...

Of Kryptonite & Supervillain Weaknesses

Every supervillain & superhero has a weakness. An Achilles heel that they must yield to in order to balance out their amazing superpowers.
For some it is a strange & alien substance that renders them powerless in its presence - like chocolate, cheese, coffee, Kryptonite, little French pastries with the icing dusted on the top...
For others, it is as simple as a sale at Nine West, a pair of Diesel jeans, the latest Apple offering, the sleek lines of a new BMW, a house in a prestigious neighbourhood or the intense need to possess a trophy wife & show her off to those high school bullies.
And still for others it's the mere thrill of the SuperSecret. The alter ego & the kick they get out of hiding that other self from those around them, while relishing all the attention their SuperEgo gets.
I, on the other hand, possess numerous weaknesses, which is clearly due to the fact that I am gifted with an impressive array of villainous superpowers.
And while I could wax lyrical about said superpowers, I prefer to leave them shrouded in mystery, since the element of surprise is a key weapon in the supervillain's arsenal & quite useful in certain situations - like a skillful card swap at the Bingo hall...
I will, however, mention that I am utterly powerless in the presence of Star Wars Lego, Belgian chocolate, a good gadget shop, a pair of hot stiletto boots at a good price, a sleek motorbike, a poetic soul, & mesmerising eyes - to name a few & in no particular order...