Supervillainous Skivvies

One thing I've always wondered since I was a child (& I was introduced to the universe of superheros & supervillains) was; who on earth makes their awesome costumes? Those outfits are styled, cut & stitched so well that Christian Lacroix is apple green with envy.
How do they do this???
Consider the fact that the majority of superheros & supervillains are men, & then contemplate the fashion & tailoring skills of the average male...
It won't take long for you to draw your own conclusions, which I'm sure will overlap with some of mine. So either:

1. All superheros & supervillains are secretly dying to have their creations hung on a bunch of skeletons & strutted down the runways of Milan & New York.
   
2. All superheros & supervillains had sweet grandmothers who owned a haberdashery & instructed them in the ways of sewing & tailoring.
3. All male superheros & supervillains are far too in touch with their feminine side.
4. All superheros & supervillains hang around at fabric shops on a regular basis & know exactly where to get that industrial-strength spandex.
5. The guidebook How To Make Your Super Costume becomes available immediately on your induction into the Super Society of your choice (be it Heros or Villains). This guidebook is obviously strictly regulated & distribution is monitored by a super-secret society (much like the elusive Illuminati - but these guys don't have anything to do with the American dollar bill, the pyramids or Lara Croft).
   

Or

• Every single superhero or supervillain has at least one special power (yes, even the "powerless ones" like Batman).
  This power is the power to create a signature super-special super-outfit to distinguish yourself from the rest of society. This does mean that it is quite possible that all superheros & supervillains are simply following their careers as a result of a need to express their own unique sense of fashion.
  

So ultimately if you intend to chose supervillainy or superheroism as a career choice, you'd better be good with a needle & thread.

I'm still wondering if Batman has the bat symbol on his undies & who does the screen-printing for that...

Anaconda = electricity

No, I'm not talking about exploiting poor little sea snakes & eels & making them do hard labour all day just to power your tv!
Some clever little Brits have invented a rather innovative wave device that it pretty much one long sea snake.
Imagine a long tube anchored to the ocean floor that "rides the waves" as they come. The waves pass down through the 200m-long rubber tube, generating energy as they go. The surge at the end of the tube, powers a turbine - which in turn generates electricity.
In comparison to other wave devices, it's far simpler, inexpensive and less hazardous to sea life.
The plan is to have "shoals" of these devices in seas where there are large waves, like Scotland, Japan, Australia, etc etc...
Now, if u attach hooks onto the outside, you could offer thrill-rides for divers & make some bucks off it :-)

Tools of the trade

So the Brits have released some new toys for a new generation: a fresh take on Action Man.
My favourite is Diving Man to the right here! While everyone else has an effective weapon, his first line of defense is a wrench. Go Diving Man! Fight back the hordes of evil terrorists with that fearsome wrench of yours.
Of course, I had no idea that terrorists were into scuba... I always thought they'd have trouble with the beards & turbans underwater. ;-)

Chocolate-powered racing car?

I'm still debating whether this is my kind of car; it's fast, sleek, responsive & practical.
It features a steering wheel made of carrots, the driver's seat is made from soya beans & the bodywork is a combination of resins & vegetable fibres. All the oil lubricants used are plant-based & the biodiesel engine runs on vegetable oil & chocolate extract.
And that's just where the problem lies with this car for me.
I happen to like chocolate & I'm not sure If I like the idea of competition in terms of chocolate consumption... I'm wondering about the exact meaning of the phrase "chocolate extract" - I have a feeling they mean the best part of the chocolate & there's no way I can compete with a racing car in terms of Lindt consumption. My energy input & output just don't compare to 233km/hr around the racetrack.
I think I should be worried!
Luckily, the car doesn't meet Formula 3 regulations in terms of it's rather unusual fuel - so it's not eligible to race in the next season. So I can at least breathe easy for now. But if production goes ahead & car manufacturers jump on the bandwagon, I hope they feed the things cheap & nasty chocolate - cos cars don't get sugar headaches!

Skulls on Mars oh my!

Man, those little green men have funny shaped heads, according to a bunch of nutters who are convinced that the picture to the left here, is of an alien skull on the surface of Mars.
Of course, this begs the question: where's the rest of the body???
Maybe the area used to be a beach and a bunch of little green men were burying a friend of theirs in the sand for fun, when a freak tidal wave came and they had to leave this poor sod in the sand...
Or maybe this guy owed some green gangster a ton of money & so they buried him up to his neck & then let some strange Martian insects eat the flesh off his skull?
And why settle on the idea of little green men? Why not speculate that it's the skull of some ferocious Martian predator that wiped out all other life on Mars, cannibalised on it's own kind and then died off from starvation? All because some clever Martian went back in time to hunt ancient Martian dinosaurs and accidentally stepped on a Martian butterfly...
Sounds crazy right? Then again, so is looking at a rock and calling it a skull!!!
You can read about the insane assumption here.

tsk tsk

I know, I know, I know! It's been ages since my last confession, I mean post & that is terrible! I'll try & get back on track I promise :-)